The 25 Drinks of a Sober Holiday Season
You owe it to your abstaining friends and family to offer something other than water and Coke
Three weeks ago, we snapped the wishbone and have been rocking our jingle bells ever since.
Well, that, and bulk recycling the Amazon packages from our Cyber Monday binge, only to then curse ourselves because we have no boxes to wrap presents in. I suck at wrapping anyway; tissue paper and oversized bags it is.
But anyway, it’s here, the season, or as Gen Z social media captions write it, SZN, a shorthand version now being used for almost any type of theme not related to the holidays at all.
And when I say it’s here, what I meant to say is that it’s been here. Our household had just finished the last fun-size pack of Skittles when “Last Christmas” hit theaters, and just last week an aunt invited my sister and me for shopping and Christmas cocktails. Hard pass.
So it’s today, yet another Friday the 13th that so far has failed to deliver anything spooky, two weeks away from 48 hours of hungry in-laws, your brother’s inappropriate Yankee swap present, and debating whether to tell your 9-year old cousin that Santa isn’t real when it hits you: Your cousin’s fiance doesn’t drink.
